Domestic violence, or intimate partner violence, occurs when an imbalance of power or control is present in a close relationship. It manifests in various forms: emotional abuse, sexual abuse, physical abuse, stalking, or threats of these actions. Abusive behaviors can include name-calling, controlling access to family and friends, preventing attendance at work or school, showing up with threats or weapons, hiding car keys, discarding medications, and threatening to take children away. While the focus is often on female victims, it’s crucial to recognize that domestic violence help is available for men as well.
Domestic Violence Statistics
Every day, over 20,000 calls are made to domestic violence hotlines across the U.S., with nearly 20 people per minute being physically abused by an intimate partner. Intimate partner violence accounts for 15% of all violent crimes. Statistics reveal that 1 in 4 women and 1 in 9 men have experienced intimate partner physical violence. While female victims often report higher rates of being beaten or choked, male victims more frequently report being bitten or having objects thrown at them. Regardless of gender, anyone can fall victim to violence.
Experts agree that domestic violence is an underreported crime, typically requiring seven acts of violence before a victim seeks help. Most societal messaging focuses on women due to higher report rates, but men also suffer in both heterosexual and same-sex relationships. The legal community acknowledges the difficulty many men face in reporting their victim status, often feeling isolated, ashamed, or financially unable to leave.
It is estimated that only 20% of male victims come forward. Fear of not being believed, perceived weakness, ridicule by law enforcement, and potential public identification as gay in same-sex relationships are significant barriers.
Seeking Help for Male Victims of Domestic Violence
Beyond physical and emotional violence, victims often turn to substance abuse, alcohol, and risky behaviors, with a noted rise in suicide rates. So, what can male victims do to leave an abusive relationship and end their suffering? Here are some steps:
Develop a Plan to Leave the Relationship
Prepare an emergency bag with clothes, medications, cash, and ID or photos of your ID. Get a burner phone and clear your search history regularly.
Distance Yourself from the Abuser
Change passwords on electronic devices frequently. Contact local shelters and determine available resources. In North Carolina, over 90 organizations support domestic violence victims across 82 cities. Document everything.
Build a Support System
Answer these questions: Who can I share my plan with? Where can I go in my neighborhood? What phone numbers must I memorize or store in a second phone? How do I include my children in this plan?
Leverage technology. Several mobile apps can record conversations, notify 911, and send messages for help, often disguised as other apps. Social media offers anonymous support groups and networks for domestic violence victims.
Podcasts featuring survivor stories and resources can also provide guidance. While many resources are geared towards women, much of the advice applies to everyone, and some focus specifically on helping men. If you need assistance finding help, contact us. We can refer you to resources or help you speak to an attorney about your rights. It would be best if you never had to face this alone.
The Law Office of Dustin McCrary – Here to Support You
At The Law Office of Dustin McCrary, we understand your challenges and are here to provide the support and guidance you need. Whether you seek resources or legal advice, we’re committed to helping you find a safe path and a brighter future. Reach out to us today, and let us help you through this difficult time.