It’s no secret that we live in a world that is perhaps more digitally connected today than ever before. In fact, social media seems to be everywhere, and its impact on day-to-day life is almost impossible to ignore. A quick look at the statistics surrounding the use of social media today prove this to be true:
- There are over 3 billion people in the world currently use social media – roughly 42% of the entire world population.
- Every second, 11 new people join social media, and those numbers will likely only continue to grow.
- According to a recent survey by the World Economic Forum, Facebook is the third most visited social website in the world with the 474% of its users visiting the site at least once a day and 1.3 million pieces of content being shared every minute.
- Between September of 2017 and October of 2018, social media users grew by 320 million, which amounts to one new social media user every 10 seconds.
The numbers don’t lie. Most of us have at least one social media account and maybe more- and if we don’t, almost all of us know many people in our lives who do. Social media has impacted almost every aspect of our lives, and most of us are used to sharing our lives regularly with others through one social media platform or another. It is now one of the routine ways by which we connect, obtain information, make and keep connections, and learn about others in the world around us.
Without question, social media has many benefits. On the other side of the coin, it can also have its downsides. This can be particularly true if you find yourself going through a divorce. Increasingly, we receive questions about the use of social media and how it affects divorce cases. This is only understandable, and it is certainly important to think through the use of social media if you find yourself contemplating or in the midst of a divorce. Below are some of the ways that you might consider the impact of social media if you are going through a divorce:
- Social media as evidence: Understandably, those who are not attorneys often do not think of their day-to-day actions in terms of how they might or might not later be used as evidence in a legal matter. With social media, however, it is wise to give this issue some thorough consideration. Increasingly, social media is being used as evidence in divorce matters – both during the divorce proceedings, and afterwards. Consider, by way of example, the following hypothetical situations:
- An ex-husband files a motion in court seeking to decrease the amount of alimony he is required to pay, claiming he is having terrible financial difficulties. His ex-wife believes he is lying. The ex-wife and her attorney search the ex-husband’s Facebook page, and see a picture his new girlfriend has tagged him in – in which they’re vacationing at an all-inclusive beach resort. Furthermore, the wife searches Twitter, and sees the ex-husband’s excited post about his recent promotion. This evidence is presented in court, and the request for a decrease in alimony is denied.
- A mother is seeking sole custody of her children. She claims that she is the “more fit” parent, and that she spends more time actively involved with her children than their father does. A quick search of her Facebook profile, however, reveals that she is often out late at night at various bars with friends where she usually appears to be intoxicated. The ex-husband and his attorney use those photos as part of their argument that granting the mother’s request is not in the best interests of the children.
These are only two examples of many ways in which social media evidence might be used with respect to divorce-related matters. Evidence might consist of photos, messages, or other posts might also be used as circumstantial evidence to prove involvement in an extramarital affair, or as proof that one spouse is continuing to engage in a damaging addictive behavior like drinking or gambling which they have been denying or covering up.
As a result, it is important to think carefully about using social media with regularity if you are contemplating or involved in a divorce, and to realize that when you post something for all to see, it may later be used against you.
- Resist the urge to overshare: One simple truth about human nature is that we like to talk, vent, and share with one another. On social media, we have become used to doing this regularly. Often without thinking twice, many of us turn to social media to vent, share, and converse with others about any number of topics. During a divorce, you may do this as second nature – often without thinking at all about whether or not your postings may have an effect on your case. While your oversharing may not always be used as evidence in your case, it can have the effect of unnecessarily involving too many other individuals in matters that you might later wish you had kept private. While everyone needs someone to talk to, during your divorce it might be wise to call a trusted friend to meet up for coffee or go on a walk. Share your concerns, fears, and worries face-to-face rather than in a public forum where many people can see them. This is not to mention that angry posts you make about your ex or soon-to-be-ex-spouse could be viewed by your children, or others who care deeply for that person. Typically, very little good comes from that either. If in doubt, refrain from oversharing – chances are that you will later be glad you did.
- Post-Divorce Possibilities: While there are certainly potential pitfalls of using social media while your divorce is ongoing, or when difficult issues like custody, alimony, and child support are still at issue between you and your ex-spouse, after the dust has settled, social media does have its positive possibilities as well. For example, many people use social media as a way to find those with whom they share common interests, and whom they may be interested in dating. It can also be a good way to keep up with any pictures of your children that your ex might post during the time that they are together – if you are able to maintain a positive and cordial relationship with your ex and believe you can do so for the long-term. Regardless of how you choose to use social media after divorce, it is still always very important to remain civil, to carefully consider what you share, and to use it with restraint. Doing so is never a choice that you’ll regret.
Ultimately, social media is somewhat of a double-edged sword. It can be a wonderful way to stay connected, informed and involved – but it can also cause lasting damage and stir up controversy that you might later regret, particularly when you are involved in a divorce. If you find yourself in this situation, it is always best to err on the side of sharing less, rather than more – knowing that eventually you can return to social media if you wish to, when the dust settles.
Certainly, you may have more questions with respect to social media and how it might play a role in your divorce proceedings, and we would welcome the opportunity to help you with those issues, or any other issues regarding divorce for which you need excellent and experienced representation. Call The Law Office of Dustin McCrary today. We look forward to helping you soon.