How to Handle Divorce When Your Spouse’s Mental Disorders Cause Distress or Impairment
If you or someone you know has ever struggled with a mental health condition, you understand how complex and challenging it can be. This is especially true when considering divorce in North Carolina due to a spouse’s mental illness. Millions of people across the country navigate life with serious mental health challenges every day, which is never easy. Likewise, living with and supporting a loved one who struggles with mental health issues can also be incredibly difficult.
But what happens when it becomes impossible to continue living with a spouse facing these challenges? If you are married to someone with a mental health condition and feel that it may be time to move forward with a divorce, the process can feel overwhelming and complicated – but you are not alone.
Without question, mental health issues can significantly impact a marriage. Not to mention that divorce is never easy, even in the best of circumstances. You may wonder how your spouse’s mental health condition might affect divorce proceedings. You may wonder if there are certain safeguards you should put in place or steps you should take differently as you go through the process. These are all important questions to ask.
Let’s take a closer look at how North Carolina divorce law might affect marriages involving mental health issues.
What’s the Difference? Fault and No-Fault Divorce
Sometimes, people ask whether mental health problems are a sufficient “reason” to get divorced. It’s an understandable question. The truth is that North Carolina, like all other states in the country, no longer requires any particular reason for a divorce. Said another way, one spouse does not have to prove any particular “fault,” or marital misconduct for the divorce to proceed. This is known as being a “no-fault” divorce state. Over the years, laws across the country have evolved to recognize that sometimes, for any number of reasons, a marriage reaches its end.
While fault is no longer required for a divorce in North Carolina, that doesn’t mean that you can’t still obtain a divorce for certain specific reasons, including severe mental health problems. Sometimes, there are reasons for choosing a “fault-based” divorce over a no-fault divorce. One reason is that if one spouse can prove misconduct on the part of the other, the court may potentially award more alimony or a more favorable asset division in their favor. Sometimes, the spouse who has been hurt simply wants to feel that “justice” has been done, and for the other spouse’s wrongdoing to be recognized and penalized. This is important to know if you are navigating a divorce in North Carolina due to one’s mental illness’s impact on your marriage.
Whatever the reason, sometimes, people do choose to pursue divorce other than the standard no-fault process that the majority of states now use. Severe mental health issues are obviously not a “fault” – no one asks for severe mental health problems, or does anything to deserve them. They can, however, be a basis for seeking divorce other than using the standard no-fault process.
What is Incurable Insanity?
Regarding severe mental health issues, North Carolina law does specify “incurable insanity” as one of its specific grounds for ending a marriage. If you’re considering a divorce in North Carolina due to mental illness, you may wonder how to prove “incurable insanity,” and that’s an understandable question.
It is important to understand that not all mental health issues will rise to the level of incurable insanity – it’s a pretty high bar to reach. In North Carolina, in order to be able to establish “incurable insanity,” more will be required than simply establishing that the person in question has a mental health issue. Ultimately, the mental health issue must be so severe that it results in confinement in a facility outside of the home, which prevents the spouses from living together. In addition, the law requires that the two spouses must not have lived together for at least the preceding three years. If this is the case, a court may grant a divorce solely on those grounds.
Understandably, however, this may lead to the question: if someone has such severe mental illness that they cannot live on their own, how can they rationally speak for themselves in the divorce process? The answer is that often, they can’t. In some circumstances, one spouse’s mental illness may be so debilitating and severe that the spouse is declared mentally incompetent. If this is the case, the spouse may need to have a guardian appointed to ensure that someone of sound mind advocates for that spouse’s interests when they cannot do so on their own.
Mental Health and Child Custody
In addition to exploring the grounds for divorcing a spouse with mental health issues, it’s also essential to understand how those issues might affect the matters you must address during the actual divorce process.
While mental health issues can affect the divorce process in general, they often raise challenging questions about child custody. For families navigating divorce in North Carolina involving mental illness, these concerns can be especially complex – particularly if one spouse may be unfit to spend extended time alone with the children. In those cases, the parent without the mental health issue may attempt to pursue full custody of the children.
Ultimately, there are two ways that custody matters can be addressed in a divorce. The first is by agreement. Increasingly, couples in North Carolina and across the country choose to resolve their divorce-related issues as much as possible outside of court. Doing so truly allows couples to find solutions to their issues that work best for their family, and it often saves time and money as well.
Sometimes, however, for any number of reasons, an out-of-court settlement isn’t possible. Mental health issues are often one of those reasons. Understandably, it can be very difficult to communicate, negotiate, and compromise with a spouse who is struggling with significant mental health problems. In these cases, the best option may simply be to have a court review and resolve the issues.
When North Carolina courts are addressing child custody matters, the law requires that they act in the child’s best interests. For that reason, the mental health of each parent could potentially play a significant role in the custody decision of the court, and in decisions the court might make about visitation rights. While a mental health issue does not necessarily mean that a parent will lose custody, it is a factor that will likely be considered.
In most cases, the parties will present their evidence and arguments regarding custody to the court, and the court will review that evidence, in addition to talking to the children themselves if they are of age, and requesting any other information from the parties that it considers important. After doing so, the court will issue a binding decision on custody that the parties must follow until and unless that order is later modified.
Termination of Parental Rights
In some cases, a parent’s mental health may deteriorate to the point that they lose their parental rights. If you are involved in a divorce in North Carolina related to mental illness, it’s important to understand that the official termination of parental rights is now something that the courts take lightly. It typically only occurs as a last resort. Often, courts will give parents multiple opportunities to seek and receive help for mental health issues before terminating parental rights. In some cases, however, it does happen if the mental health issue is severe enough.
If one parent seeks termination of the other parent’s parental rights, it will be necessary to file a petition with the court. In North Carolina, only a child’s parent, court-appointed guardian, or the Department of Social Services in the county where the parent lives can file such a petition. The petition seeking to terminate parental rights should include as much evidence as possible that the termination is warranted.
After the petition has been filed, the court will usually schedule a hearing within 90 days, although court schedules and priorities will vary by location. The court will ultimately review all evidence and arguments presented with the petition and issue a decision as to whether or not parental rights will be terminated. If rights are terminated, that parent will no longer have the right to visit with the child, make decisions with regard to the child’s well-being, or otherwise be involved in any parental way.
The termination of parental rights is a very significant step that should only be taken after careful thought and consultation with an attorney who knows and understands the law.
Call The Law Office of Dustin McCrary for Answers to Your Situation
At The Law Office of Dustin McCrary, we know that divorce can be a complicated process even in the best of circumstances. Certainly, it can be far more difficult when one spouse is struggling with mental health issues. If you find yourself in this situation, you may feel overwhelmed and uncertain, wondering what steps to take to protect your rights and move forward toward the future with confidence that you’ve made the best decisions for yourself and your family. We understand that, and it’s why we’re here to help. We know and understand every aspect of divorce law, because it’s all we do. We’d love to put that knowledge to work for you, and we’re here to help. If you’re ready to get started, give us a call today. We look forward to talking with you soon.