There is a lot of misinformation about child custody, particularly regarding mothers’ rights. You may have heard that only mothers have custody rights in North Carolina or are consistently awarded superior rights over fathers. We have provided accurate information on this topic to clear up these myths. In North Carolina, mothers and fathers have equal rights to custody of a child until a judge orders otherwise or the parties have a written agreement. There are two types of custody to consider: physical and legal.
Mother’s Rights: Physical vs. Legal Custody
Physical custody refers to where the children are and who they are with. It involves the children’s schedule concerning school, weekends, holidays, and location at any given time. Legal custody, on the other hand, consists of the right to make significant decisions about the child’s or children’s welfare. This includes medical and mental health care decisions, education, and other important life decisions when the children cannot make them themselves.
If parents agree on custody issues, they can use a separation agreement or co-parenting order to dictate shared legal custody, even if the parents are unmarried. Most custody agreements involve joint legal custody, meaning decisions regarding school, non-emergency medical care, and extracurricular activities are made mutually. If parents cannot agree, the court will rule in the child’s best interest.
There is a common misconception that mothers are favored for physical custody. However, courts have become more progressive, frequently awarding 50/50 joint physical custody. Both parents are entitled to time with their children, and studies show that children benefit from having substantial time with both parents, which improves their self-esteem, school performance, and social growth. The expectation that mothers will automatically have sole custody is outdated. Both mothers and fathers should work together to ensure their children feel loved and supported by both parents, regardless of the custody schedule.
Determining a Custody Schedule
While settling and agreeing on child custody issues is preferred, it isn’t always possible. When proposing a physical custody schedule, several factors must be considered. The proximity of the parents’ homes can make a 50/50 physical custody schedule more straightforward to manage. Some parents opt for a week-on, week-off schedule or an alternating 2-2-3 schedule. These schedules work well if both parents live in the same school district and have compatible work schedules.
If an accurate 50/50 schedule is not feasible, there are other ways for a parent to have more physical time with the children. For example, a parent can transport the children to and from school daily, have dinner with them a few nights a week, or spend time with them during school breaks and holidays. A phone family time app can help parents manage school calendars, extracurricular activities, and other events. This allows parents to attend practices, games, and school functions and share responsibilities such as doctor or dentist visits.
Parents can also include a “right to babysit” clause in their separation agreement. This gives the non-custodial parent the first option to watch the child if the custodial parent needs a sitter. Technology, such as FaceTime or Zoom, can also maintain communication, providing a valuable connection when physical presence isn’t possible.
The court system increasingly supports ways to ensure parents remain involved in their children’s lives. Parents should embrace these changes and always prioritize the child’s best interests, as the court will.
McCrary Pack – Here to Support You
At McCrary Pack, we understand the complexities of custody cases and are here to provide the guidance you need. If you are facing custody issues, contact us today to learn how we can help you navigate these challenging situations and support your family’s well-being.